Thursday, April 21, 2011

I. Am. Superwoman.

Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.




FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Praise Him!
IT'S OVER.....LIKE, ITS REALLY REALLY OVER. I still can't believe it, I keep waiting for that phone call with the automated voice reminding me about my upcoming treatment.  It's a weird feeling to be done with all that "stuff".  I mean, it completely ran my life for 7 months and then all of sudden, it's over and I have NO IDEA what to do now! Don't get me wrong, I would much rather have no clue what to do, than sit in that chair for 7 hours, it's still gonna take some getting used to.  While I was going through it, I think my body's defense mechanisms took complete control (thank GOD) and I had myself convinced that it wasn't really all that bad.  When it was all over, and I had time to reflect on everything (and my little defense system turned off!) I finally realized the truth.....THAT IT SUCKED!!!!!!! and I mean real bad! Seriously yall, there was nothing fun about the last 8 months! I can say that now b/c it's over and I don't ever have to do it again. Throughout this whole canSer ordeal, I've heard a million different people tell me a million different ways about how strong I was, I'm gonna be honest and say I had no clue what yall were talking about! I didn't understand why everyone thought I was so strong, I mean, I didn't do anything extraordinary....I didn't feel like I did anything except go to the doctor every other week and get medicine.  But now that it's over and I can really think about what has happened since August, I completely agree with all of you! There is no way you can get through a canSer diagnosis without being strong....you have to be or you'll completely fall apart.  I definitely didn't do it alone though (I'm not THAT strong!) I became a praying machine and developed a relationship with God that I can't even begin to put in words....and my support system, wow.....I'm not sure I can put that into words either.  I have been blessed with the greatest family and friends in the world.  You guys have no idea how much you mean to me. My rock has always been my friends and family and there is no way I could've gotten through it without them. I lost touch with one of my best friends in the whole world a million years ago, and b/c of all this I have her back in my life. She has been a constant through this battle, whether it was a Bible verse or a simple "thinking about u" text message....she was there, so Tar-bear...thank you, I love you with all my heart :o) So many people made so many sacrifices for me, and I will be forever grateful to you all. And a quick little shout out to my Savannah peeps....yall have been AMAZING...I can't even believe all the support I've gotten from you guys....LOVE YALL TO DEATH!!!
 While we're talking about strength, I was lucky enough to personally witness the very definition of the word.  I recently attended the life celebration service of a friend who passed away from canSer.....notice I didn't say "lost his battle".  I CANT STAND THAT TERM....it's ridiculous, if you really think about.  I've said it before, and I'll say it again....anyone, who can sit in front of a doctor, be told they have canSer, get up and walk away, and then fight it with every inch of their being didn't lose anything.  So lets try to NEVER say someone with canSer lost, if anything, they gained the will to survive.....and that's some powerful stuff.  K, Im gonna get off my bandwagon :o) This service I attended was the most beautiful thing I've ever witnessed, it was outside in a park, there was music, there was laughter, there was even dancing! It was the very definition of a celebration of life.  Listening to his father, best friend, sister, and wife, completely blew me away....it was honestly overwhelming to see. You could literally feel the love and strength radiating from them like rays from the sun. It was an extremely powerful thing. So, to the Williams family....your strength gives us all hope, may we all learn to live life with the optimism and grace you have shown. You will forever be in our thoughts and prayers :o)
Soooooooo, what's next for me you ask??? I HAVE NO IDEA!!! and I'm not stressing about it one bit :o) I'm thinking about moving back to Savannah....didn't realize how much I missed it until my recent trip down there. I feel...better yet, I KNOW a lot is about to change in my life and generally that would scare me to death...but I've beat canSer twice dude.....IM NOT SCARED OF ANYTHING!!!! Watch out for me you guys, I have a strong feeling I'm about to set the world on fire!!!!!! (not literally)  :o)
LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE :o)


~though he stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him 

with his hand~.
Psalms 37:24

~TRUST HIM~


R.I.P. Patrick.....may your light continue to shine and may your music play on. :o)

Receive your healing Kathy & Pete!! You're in our thoughts and prayers...love u guys!!!!!!!!!




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